Exposing the Damaged Beyond Repair

Black Women, the Matrix is unlocked - you can go now.
Classic DBR

I have been doing a lot of catching up on the blogs today. There is a lot of great material up right now. The Black Women Empowerment bloggers have not only created a new lane for conversation, they have transformed it into an information super highway! There is just so many wonderful women creating wonderful spaces for conversation. It really is inspiring. They all have their different styles and attitudes but the message is one of the same: Black Women need to MOVE ON because there is an abundance of good life outside of the matrix!

MOVING ON may mean dating outside of your race or culture, quitting a dead-end job, cutting off leeching friends and relatives or simply seeing things in a new light. No matter what your MOVE ON entails,  please do it as soon as possible. Don't let fear or uncertainty or nay-sayers stop you.They will MISS YOU once you're gone. They will CLAMOR for you to return. They will even try to trick you into thinking you have already done all you need to do. This last point is CRITICAL. Folks may try to tell you that since you've done "all the right things" all you need to do now is sit and wait. You've done "everything you can do" so you just need to sit back and relax! SMH!! This is a classic ploy at work. Don't fall into the trap. If you FEEL like something needs to change, go with your GUT. The GUT never lies.

Now, on to other news.

Kanye West - the biggest little kid on earth, had another public meltdown over the weekend at the MTV Awards. What is this, the upteenth time this man has acted like a crybaby on national television? What is his DEAL anyway? 

What I find most interesting is that black women on nearly EVERY black gossip site are coming to his defense. Taylor Swift is a stuck-up, racist white b*tch while Kanye is just some misunderstood brother fighting for justice. HUH??

I don't even know where to begin. I see how long some of these other black women have been writing and I don't know how they do it. I don't know how you consistently try to reach out to women so hell-bent on SELF-destruction. Like I said in the piece on The Root, many black women know that black men are not worthy of their defense and hard work. They know, deep down, that these men are never going to start "acting right". But instead of abandoning ship, they are just rearranging the chairs on the Titanic. They are buying time (for what, I don't know) until something happens. That something was supposed to be the election of Barack Obama. His marriage to Michelle was supposed to convince black men that typical-looking black women were worthy of the title of wife. Every successful black man was supposed to run "home" looking for their Michelle. Well, we are eight months in and none of that has happened. In fact, the illegitimacy rate has gone up since Obama took office. I guess all those happy black people were drunk off celebration last fall and made some babies? 

The Root of Black Woman Destruction
Classic DBR

The Root
, the Washington Post's sad attempt at "keeping it real", is literally a waste of cyberspace. No good writers, no good content, and clearly no idea that black women may actually read the site. The "editors" of this website know that the only black women that read The Root are the older, educated ones. Younger black women and working class black women are not clicking in in large numbers. So the DBRs that write for the site aren't able to target those women and e-bludgeon them. However, the women they CAN e-assault are older black women, many of whom are professional and according to numerous stats are unlikely to be married. The rate of singlehood among educated black women shouldn't be of grave concern to black journalists since less than 20% of us have college degrees. The VAST majority of black women are not traditionally educated and even fewer have obtained professional degrees. So why all of this obsession with educated black women being single?

Because a DBR's main motivation is to malign their targets and they will find ANY way to do this. Educated, professional black women are NOT making up the large percentage of baby momma's in black America. We, in a sense, are completely anti-thetical to the current definiton of an African-American woman. Most of us are not living in a poor neighborhood and supporting an entire family on our low income salary. We are not filling up the pews at church every Sunday, praying for a man that will never come. We are not letting any black man with a pulse enter our vaginas and deposit his semen. We are not aiding and abetting the DBR madness. So a DBR's usual attack mode will not affect us. The usual "all black women are lazy, fat baby mama's" won't apply to the EBPW. We can't be called "welfare queens" or be told that our gawdy weaves and nails and clothing make us unattractive. Most of us do not carry ourselves in that manner. So what is a DBR left to do? Use the single rate amongst professional black women to harass ALL black women.

The Root and their DBR writers and editors (male and female) want to make one thing clear: ALL black women are on the same level in their eyes and ALL of us should just be happy that ANY black man would be willing to DO ANYTHING AT ALL. The message in all of these tired articles is that black women who have not submitted to the great genitalia of the black man is an UPPITY, ENTITLED BITCH! That's right, folks. If you have not given in to the lure of the great black penis, if you are not willing to subjugate yourself and lower yourself just to have a black man inside you, there is something wrong with you. See, this is how child-like and simple-minded DBRs are. It all comes down to sexual power and control. DBR black men and their female enablers want all black women to be under some psychotic "dick-control". This is why the black women that support and cheer on DBRs don't mind selling you down the river. They long ago bought into the hype and instead of admitting that they were sold some magic beans, they cling to this myth while drowning.

Think I'm lying? Take a look at their arsenal!

What Single Women Can Learn from Michelle
What Single Women Can't Learn from Michelle
Memo to Black Women: Get Real!
Successful and Still Unmarried

Beauty is in the Eye of the DBR
Classic DBR

Here is a classic example of DBR behavior on full display. Jamie Foxx and his radio co-<strike>whores</strike>horts "discuss" why beautiful women should only date rich men and vice-versa. I wonder what their definition of beautiful is. Shame on Kandi Burress for even participating in this mess. But I heard she was "engaged" to a man with six children or something so I shouldn't be surprised.

African-Americans have a very sick and twisted view of money and beauty. Some call it "indoctrination of European beauty standards" but I don't. I've grown up in the same country as every other African-American and have been exposed to the same media. **I** find beauty in ALL types of features, especially West-African. If I, an African-American woman and other African-American women and PLENTY of non African-American men can find a WIDE array of features beautiful then those that CAN'T see beauty in them simply DO NOT WANT TO. Most African-American men and women simply DO NOT want to see beauty in their own phenotypes and complexions. That is certainly their RIGHT but it is also your RIGHT to steer clear of folks that seek to elevate others over you. How do you benefit from that?

So how do I know that Jamie Foxx & Co.'s definition of beauty would probably not include most typical-looking black women?:

Here is Jamie Foxx with his date during the 2006 Oscar season. Notice the type of woman he takes to "high profile" red carpet events.

His "playful" treatment of a blond white woman at a Hollywood nigtclub.

His "playful" treatment of a black woman at a black nightclub

Do you think Jamie would have bent a white woman over like that in a white nightclub with white men standing around? How do you think white men would have responded to Jamie doing this? Jamie, and other DBRs like him, know their "limits" when it comes to their treatment of other women in public. Non-blacks place STRICT invisible rules and codes on Negroes when it comes to their women. They absolutely would not tolerate this kind of public display. As you can see in the small photograph above, black men have no such codes to protect black women from ANYTHING, especially other black men. 

Black women, EVERYTHING  a person does is a sign of their TRUE intents and motivatios. There is no such thing as "that's different" or "that doesn't count" or "those women are.....".

It is CRITICAL that you look at a person's actions and how they relate to YOU.


Essence Magazine: Back-Handed Compliments for Today's Black Woman (Part 1)
Classic DBR

While this journal will primarily focus on DBR black males (because I am a woman interested in the upliftment of other women) from time to time it will be necessary to point out the DBR black women and institutions that continue to undermine black women. Case in point, Essence magazine. Numerous blogs have attacked Essence for their mean-spirited, racist attitude towards the very women they claim to want to "uplift". From suggesting women go to strip clubs to meet men, to constantly promoting "eligible" black bachelors that have no interest in dating/marrying typical-looking black women to their sheer adoration of Tyler Perry - the magazine is pretty much a ***thinking*** black woman's worst nightmare. Like most lifestyle publications, Essence has had to turn its attention to celebrities to remain competitive in print and especially online. No focus on black women dating interracially or interculturally despite the MOUNTING evidence that not only is it a necessity for black women to start doing this but many black women are already doing it!

One of the ways in which Essence undermines black women is by pretending that the issues black women face (lack of REAL dating opportunities, misogynistic popular culture, health disparities, unrealistic "beauty" standards) are issues that we tend to turn into "bigger" deals or bring on ourselves. It's the "we just need to love ourselves" in magazine form. You know, the usual "how can you expect a good black man to love you if you don't love yourself" tripe. It is YOUR FAULT that black men chase light/bright/white because YOU chanse light/bright/white, right? Here is one example of Essence's attempt at blaming black women for problems that tend to originate from ***other*** folks' behavior.

Black Women Behaving Badly: a terribly written piece on why "sisters" "hate" on each other and what "we" need to do to come correct. Notice that whenever there is an issue with the way black women behave towards each other no one EVER tries to find out the root cause of the animosity. Why? Because all roads lead back to DBR males. Black women don't get along because 95% of the time they are competing for and posturing over a BLACK MAN. And due to the immense "shortage" of "good black men" most black women feel like they cannot trust each other or if they help another black woman in ANY way she will have a "leg up" and snag that IBM (ideal black man). Not only is this paranoia REAL, it has been DELIBERATELY planted in black women. How many Crap & B (R&B) songs have the line "Don't listen to your girlfriends, baby, listen to yo man," or how many "relationship advisors" tell black women that we need to learn to "trust a man" and "stop listening to all those other women" because after all, they are just lonely, bitter and miserable and trying to bring you down. Now, to some extent this may be true. Women should ALWAYS look at the life circumstances of anyone trying to give them advice. But in the black community the seeds of distrust between black women were planted decades ago and the forest is overgrown. I notice that women of other races/cultures thrive on "women time" and the MEN of other cultures encourage women to fraternize. Those men realize that women gain strength from each other and tend to be happier and healthier when they have a supportive female network. DBR men, on the other hand, are threatened by any outside force helping to shape a woman's perspective. DBR men do not know how women think/feel/operate because they tend to not care. Their main concern is keeping a woman in lock-step with THEM so she can be readily available for whatever HE needs. A woman with a strong support network will likely have her friends and supporters point out the DBR and encourage her, REPEATEDLY, to kick him to the curb. But if a black woman's "network" consist of other paranoid, delusional, "loyal to brothas to the end" types of women she is more likely to be talked OUT OF making good choices. She is more likely to be told that she is "trippin'" or "needs to let a man be a man" or "better realize you got a good black man". This is why many black men like the constant bickering and drama many black women engage in. This is why they infiltrate gossip/celebrity/entertainment blogs more than any other race of HETEROSEXUAL men. This is why they say and do certain things in real life and online to get a ***RISE*** out of black women. This is why they encourage black women to devote all their attention to getting/keeping a man. Never mind the fact that black men shoot and kill each other at an alarmingly high rate and most have ZERO interpersonal skills. "Brothas" don't get along any better than "sistas" do yet this bitterness is always attributed to black women solely.

Essence, in a poor attempt at "creating dialogue" allowed an unsubstantiated, poorly researched, poorly sourced article to be published. But as you will see this is par for the course.

I will post Part 2 of this discussion tomorrow.


Van Jones: a DBR in Sheep's Clothing
Classic DBR

I must be honest with you when I say that I haven't been following the hub-bub over Van Jones' voluntary resignation. Like many of the controversies in the Obama administration, Jones' embarassing public flogging could have been avoided if Obama had learned how to vet and screen carefully. Like many men that grew up without fathers, Obama tries to compensate for the areas in which he lacks by trying to appeal to as many people as possible. He is far too trusting and easily blind-sided. But I digress.

Jones' resignation comes on the heels of right-wing and moderates screeching about his past racist and Anti-American statements. Yes, I said racist and I agree that it is racist. Claiming that black boys wouldn't shoot up a school when black boys are raping, assaulting and basically terrorizing black GIRLS in school settings should have been a clear DBR warning sign. I know, Van Jones is "educated and successful" and would be the ideal black man on paper. But black women have to learn to look past "credentials" and examine a man's motivations and his opinions on ALL aspects of human relationships. Any man who would make a statement elevating black boys over white boys when it comes to performing violent acts in a school setting is either naive or trying to prop himself up indirectly. Van Jones, a black man, benefits from black boys being seen as less threatening than white boys. There is no benefit TO HIM in discussing the harsh brutalities that occur in all-black schools and residential areas because a)he probably has not lived in one for some time if at all and b)the MAIN perpetrators in those environments are males that look like HIM.

I also find it interesting that this man was willing to take a paycheck from the same government he claims orchestrated an attack to kill thousands of its citizens. If Van Jones believes that 9/11 was an "inside job" and that the government is covering things up, why would he EVER agree to be on the government's payroll? Where is his sense of right and wrong? The Obama administration did not "clear up" these alleged circumstances surrounding the 9/11 attacks, so how would working for Obama be any different? If a man of conviction felt that way about America, that man should NEVER accept a DOLLAR of America's money. These are all signs of a man with weak morals.

We also should not ignore the elephant in the room here:

Van "black power" Jones is married to a white woman. This should come as no surprise to any black woman that pays attention. I call it the "Black Man Up" matrix. Black men that are part of the "Black Man Up" posse tend to be extremely "race" conscious and work on behalf of "uplifting" black people publicly but IN REALITY they are all about uplifting black men ONLY. Here are the basic components:

1. Educated Black Man
2. A career in either public policy, African-American "studies", Entertainment, Law, etc
3. A deep emphasis on being black and MALE in America
4. Advocates for programs that benefit black men FIRST and then claims that this help will "trickle down" to black women
5. Regularly engages in bashing white men (the establishment), blames white men ONLY for lack of opportunity for black MEN
6. Regularly engages in bashing white men (the establishment), blames white men ONLY for black women outpacing black men in education, employment, etc.
7. Advocates FAILED economic and social policies that limit black women's freedom and femininity (public assistance, "job training", "free" childcare, "free" medical care, welfare to workfare, etc).
8. Married to a non-black woman

Henry Louis Gates, Cornel West, Julian Bond, etc. All these men have a lot in common and it is not just the non-black spouse. Having a non-black spouse does not automatically make you a DBR but in most cases they go hand in hand. Why? Because black men benefit from elevating women of other races but they benefit more from DENIGRATING non-black men (especially white). Van Jones' "black boys wouldn't do a Columbine" was a classic example of denigration of white males. This is not a "real talk" type of moment. It would have been "real talk" if Jones then said that while black boys have not shot up a school "Columbine style" YET, they are certainly not immune from wrecking havoc on communities - just in different ways. Had he said this he would have REALLY been "keeping it real" as opposed to satisfying his own pleasures of white man bashing. I wonder how the father of his wife felt about his comments.

Anyway, I wanted to post about Jones because I have been hearing black women on the net coming to his defense - doing their usual knee-jerk "they just out to get a brotha" nonsense.

Van Jones is not YOUR brother in any way, shape or form unless you are actually his sister. He does not need you to protect and defend him. He is a MAN and should either protect or defend himself or have other men come to his rescue. Mrs. Jones can also come to her husband's defense PUBLICLY is she so chooses.

By the way, what the hell does a "Green Czar" do anyway? SMH.


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